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Groceries I never buy

Today I bought groceries, as I usually do on Saturday mornings. Since we don’t have a car anymore, I walk to the store about 15-20 minutes away, do my shopping, and take a taxi back to the apartment with groceries for a week. This time Mark reminded me to buy snacks. Something about it getting colder outside makes us snack more. But anyway…

I was thinking today, as I passed the masses of people waiting in lines within the grocery store, of all the things that Chileans buy that I never buy. Like sliced cheese from a deli window. I just buy a package of sliced cheese, but Chileans buy slices from the deli almost every day for that evening’s meal. Take a number!

Also, ham. I never buy lunch meat EVER. Don’t get me started on all the chemicals that they put into your “meat” so that they can make it that shape. But Chileans stand in another line at another deli window almost every day so they will have ham (the generic word here for lunch meat of any origin) for their evening meal. Or breakfast the next day. Just let me say, “yuck.”

Then there’s the fresh bread weighing line. I do occasionally buy one kind of fresh bread rolls that don’t have shortening. But usually I buy it fresh on the day I want to eat it from the bakery on the corner by my apartment, not at the grocery store on a weekly trip. So I can skip that line too.

The only line I have to wait in (before I head to the check out, of course) is the veggie and fruit weighing line. Four guys (I’m not being sexist, they are all men!) sit there at their special table near the produce weighing fruit and veggies on their scales that print out stickers with the price. I guess that saves the checkout clerks time, but it seems to me like one more ineffeciency of Chile. And more time spent in line.

Finally I get to the checkout, and pay for the food I DO usually buy. Then I head outside and wait again for the taxi. Mark wonders why it takes so long to go to the grocery store, but I’m not worried about it. July first will be our first day back living in the States, and I can be more efficient again.

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Where’s my camera when I need it?

Maybe I need a camera phone after all. I needed it on Sunday, and since I didn’t have one, I will try to paint a word picture for you.

We drove up to the butcher’s store in Doug and Carey’s Hyundai van. It’s a big store on a corner of a major street. Don’t think of these outdoor markets with slabs of meat hanging around in the open air. This is a meat store with coolers and freezers and men who use plastic gloves to cut normal slabs of meat and weigh it on digital scales.

Mark and Carey went in to buy steak to grill while Doug and I sat in the van out front with the kids. Doug and Carey have four kids, ages 14 to 7, and our three were there, too. Megan, the baby, was asleep on my lap. (Okay, so it is still Chile. We didn’t have any carseats that day.)

Johnny, age 11-ish, and Doug start talking about the guy who has a little stand out front of the butcher’s shop. I hadn’t really noticed him before that. He has a square table and a big umbrella for shade. He also has a display board of maybe 12 folk music cds that he’s selling, and a karaoke machine. He’s playing loud music and occasionally breaking in with an advertisement for the butcher’s shop. “Today only, get your steak at only $2.50 a pound.” Or something like that using pesos and kilos instead. It goes really well with his folk music, let me tell you.

Doug tells Johnny, “I’ll give you three dollars if you go over there and ask the guy to sing ‘O Canada’ on his karaoke machine.” Johnny’s thinking about it. I say, “I’ll give you three dollars if you get him to turn the thing off.” I didn’t think he would, but I should have known. It was Johnny. He’s fearless.

After a couple of minutes of thinking it over, he jumps out of the passenger side door and walks over to the 60-something-year-old man. We can’t hear what he says, but the music keeps playing and Johnny comes back grinning.

“What did he say?” “He said I would have to pay him to turn it off.” “Did you offer him part of your three dollar reward?” “No, why should I share my reward with him?” “Well, what reason did you give him to turn it off?” “None.” Silly Johnny.

Mark and Carey came back and we drove away. But it didn’t occur to me until later that it’s not normal to have a karaoke guy advertising the butcher under an umbrella on the street. Funny.

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All wrapped up

Gift-giving in Chile is a time-honored tradition. And free gift wrap at almost every store is part of the tradition.

On Saturday we took the whole family for a walk to the nearby mall in search of a birthday gift for a friend of the girls’ from church. He turned four on Sunday, and this mall has the best toy store around. So after we picked out a set of five Hot Wheels cars for $9, I stood in line to pay while Mark took the girls to get some lunch in the food court.

I took the opportunity to buy a gift for Jenna’s upcoming third birthday while they weren’t looking. Then I got the two gifts wrapped after standing in a separate line/mob. No one really knew who had arrived first, and there were several people waiting around for one of the two gift-wrapper ladies to finish. But it was eventually my turn, and I sailed through the process, having already become accustomed to the routine.

“Boy or girl?” “One of each.” “Okay. Is this paper alright?” Dinosaurs and princesses. “Fine.” After a few moments of watching the process, I am internally laughing.

My mother spent a good amount of time teaching me some basic life skills: bed-making and gift-wrapping are similar. It’s all in the corners. But apparently, even though this lady is a professional gift-wrapper, she hasn’t figured that out yet.

In Chile, the most common way to wrap a gift is to put it inside a ready-to-fill envelope made of wrapping paper. They fold the paper in half and tape it together, usually along the back of the envelope. Then they fold and tape up the bottom to form a kind of thin sack. Once you show up with the gift/filler, they shove it in, whether or not the bag they’ve made is the right size, fold and tape up the top, and add a bow. They use these bows where you pull the ribbons and they sort of scrunch themselves up into a bow-like shape. Every gift uses at least a meter of scotch tape, I would guess.

Well, the gifts I bought stuck out of the lady’s pre-made sacks, so she had to actually use a flat sheet of wrapping paper. I laughed because, even though she had to actually wrap the box, she didn’t tape down the top flaps. She taped them to one another standing up, so it would LOOK like a sack! Here’s the photo:

 

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Christmas in the Summertime

I read online that there has been a big ice storm in the Midwest, and my mom says that she has 10 inches of snow on her driveway, and more on the way. It’s hard to imagine from here. Today was somewhere around 80 degrees, a few high clouds, and a slight breeze. A lovely beginning to summer, in my opinion!

But it’s also hard to realize that Christmas is right around the corner. I mean, it’s only a few days away, and we are going to the swimming pool everyday. Definitely one of the harder adjustments for me.

Imagine Christmas without “Let It Snow, Let It Snow, Let It Snow!” Imagine the Christmas decoration aisle at the store right next to the lawn chairs and pool accessories. Imagine kids getting out of school for summer break a few days before Christmas. That’s what we are experiencing here.

But not everything about Christmas is different here. Some things, especially the imported North American consumerism parts of Christmas, are still (laughably) the same. Santa still wears a thick coat, even at the mall where the A/C is on because it’s so hot. The coolest Christmas tree for sale at the store drops artificial snow from the top into an inverted umbrella at the bottom, creating the sensation that the tree is growing in some outdoor place in the northern hemisphere. “Christmas” songs still play in English in the stores, “Jingle Bells”, “Good King Wenseslas”, “Frosty the Snowman”, etc. Did you ever notice how many of them are really not about the holiday, but just about the weather?

The only place that seems to have made some attempt to reconcile this dichotomy is Starbucks. Starbucks in Chile has the red and white signs with candy canes (nowhere to be seen here, by the way) and wrapped packages, but no snow or mittens. The people in the ads wear shorts and ride their bikes through a park of evergreens. The ads don’t hawk caramel apple cider or peppermint hot cocoa, but rather dulce de leche Frappuccinos and other cold drinks. It’s Christmas, but it’s Christmas in Chile, and it makes me want to buy more Starbucks just because they actually put thought into their ads.

Here’s to a great holiday, wherever you are. Cheers!

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Bus Adventures

As we travel around Santiago by bus these days, we are often surprised at the things that we experience. Here are a few from just this week:

  • The man riding beside us with his young daughter sleeping on his lap bought Rachel a 4-ounce Coke from the vendor who got on the bus with his soft-sided cooler full of about 30 little bottles to sell to the passengers for about 50 cents each. I think the man felt guilty for drinking his little Coke in front of Rachel, so he bought her one, too.
  • Many singers, usually with guitars, get on the bus to sing and ask for donations, but this week dreadlocks and drums were a unique bus ride show.
  • Vendors of all kinds get on and describe their product in loud voices. This week we had the opportunity to buy ink pens, sewing needles, file folders, coloring books to teach us English words (!), and socks.
  • Beggars also get on the bus. They have a pattern to their stories. First they get your attention and say that they hate to have to do this, but there is no other way for them to feed their family. Then they tell you their story, without looking anyone in the eye. Then they say God bless you all and have a safe trip, and walk through the bus with their hand out for coins.
  • The favorite of all bus riders at this hot time of the year is the ice cream man. He has either a foam cooler or a masking-tape-reinforced cardboard box full of popsicles: blackberry, pineapple, orange dreamsicle, plain orange, chocolate cream. Only 20 cents each!

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The Van

Those of you who read Mark’s blog (itismark.wordpress.com) will already be aware of the recent demise of our van, may it rest in peace. This van has plagued us from the start with problem after problem, and I for one am glad that it is finally dead.

But what exactly do you do with a kaput car in Chile? I mean, in the States I would sell it to the junk yard, or give it to charity to be fixed for someone who needs it, or at least recycle the scrap metal somewhere. But here in Santiago, where people leave things outside by the curb to just disappear when they are done with them, how do you get rid of something as big as a van?

Well, we didn’t just leave it at the curb, in case you were wondering. In fact, we sold it to the first person who came to see it on the first day it was for sale! (Maybe we should have asked for more as far as the price, but to me it is priceless just having it sold.)

I called the buyer directly. See, last year when we were still in the old house, this guy came riding a bike down our street handing out his business card to anyone and everyone. He makes his living buying cars like ours that have some good parts (ours had a decent exterior and interior) and some bad parts (ours needs a new engine). Then he puts together new vehicles and sells them. We’ll call him the puzzlemaker.

So, as is my habit, I had glue-sticked his business card into my spiral notebook of cards. This is how I keep track of all the people who I meet or get recommended. I have no idea why I thought I might need to know the puzzlemaker someday, but his card was there, so I called him.

“Yes, how much do you want for it? I’ll come this morning.”

One trip to the notary later, and it’s gone. He towed it away with a nylon rope and his car. I wondered if his method of towing would work (slippery rope, small car, big van), but you know, it’s not my problem anymore. What a relief!

 

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Cabin Fever

This weekend is our national staff women’s retreat. Carey and I have been planning this for some time, and I am really looking forward to it. (No, I won’t give away the surprise about what we are going to do there!) But the hardest part, as usual, has been the accomodations.

First, we looked online for cabins that we could use. The key to cabins is that we can cook our own food, and thus reduce the cost of the conference for our staff. At first, we found lots of cabins online between Santiago and Concepción, the two cities our staff women live in. But as we began to call these so-called cabins, we noticed that many of them are not equipped with kitchens or kitchenettes of any kind! I still can’t figure out how that can be a cabin, but we narrowed down the list.

Then we began to call about the prices. Commonly, even if they have a website, Chilean hotels and cabins will not list their prices. You have to call to find out how much it costs to stay there. Why have a website? So we narrowed it down to a few that we could afford.

Finally, we tried to get reservations. I sent two separate places reservation requests through their own websites. No response. Again, I ask you, why have a website? So I called them. Please use our website, one said. I did, I said. Try again, they said. I didn’t.

In the end, there is only one set of cabins that has kitchenettes, affordable prices, and will actually talk to us. Never mind that their website only worked for about three days, and now we can’t see it anymore. They sent me an email last week to confirm, and I responded in the affirmative, so we are all ready to go. Right?

Since I have had experience with this happening before, I also called to confirm that reservation a few days ago. “Oh yes, of course. Señora Amanda. We have your reservation right here. Just give us a call right before you arrive so we can unlock the front gates.” Okay, we are in business.

Today Coté called them to get directions to the cabins from the bus station. “A reservation for HOW MANY people? Six, right?” No, it is for ten people! “I don’t know if we have that much availability…” Coté called me right away.

I called them back, “Yes, Señora. We have your reservation. One cabin for five and two cabins for two people each.” That makes nine, I explain. They told me the big cabin would hold six before. (I have the email as proof!) “Hmm, well, I will see what I can do…”

I guess we will see what he can do, too….

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The Empanada

September in Chile is the beginning of spring and, as if to celebrate our exit from the cold and wet of winter, we celebrate two days back-to-back of national holidays. September brings the height of Chilean national pride, with national flags being sold everywhere and everyone looking forward to their days of vacation. It’s almost like if in the US our Fourth of July and Labor Day were rolled into one big holiday in April.

As you can imagine, the whole month is devoted to preparing for these holidays, celebrating these holidays, and recovering from these holidays. Part of the preparation includes the annual “10 Best Empanadas of Santiago” competition.

An empanada is something like a Hot Pocket, but homemade. It’s traditionally filled with pino (a mixture of beef, onions, and spices), a few raisins, a slice of hard-boiled egg, and an un-pitted black olive. It’s one of the very few foods that Chileans eat with their hands. (Fried chicken and pizza always require a fork and knife.)

When you pick up the empanada, it feels warm and firm. You hold it at one end of the semi-circle, and bite into the pointy part at the top. The first bite is usually mostly bread, because that’s where the crust comes together. But the second bite is usually the juiciest. The meat-onion juice may come squirting out the top if you are not careful, and the steam will make your glasses fog. As you eat it down, you will definitely need several napkins, and if you are in the company of friends or family, you may decide to lick up some of the juice that runs down your hands. 

This is the appetizer for the coming meal of grilled steak and boiled potatoes. Maybe a few tomatoes, but you ar definitely going to feel your meal later. No wonder they eat it at lunch. It takes all day and night to digest!

Yesterday on the way to pick up Rachel from school, I walked by the place I would put at the top of my personal Top Ten Places to Get Empanadas. Against my better judgment, I decided to buy one. The first bite was all bread, but in the second bite I struck paydirt: the grease-coated olive jumped out of my empanada and ran right down my chin and my jacket before bouncing off the toe of my shoe and onto the ground. Chalk that up to a Chile Moment!

I hope that wherever you are, you have a Happy Dieciocho!

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The crazy taxi driver

I went to the bus station to pick up Millie, who visited from Ohio the past two weeks. She was coming back on a day bus from Concepción, six hours away. Millie had two suitcases and a backpack, which we got into the Metro and out at the end of the subway line near my apartment. We decided to take a taxi from there.

 At the subway exit is a taxi station. A group of taxi drivers have organized a system of waiting at the exit for passengers, each taking their turn.

We went to the lead taxi, who was supposed to take the next fare. I had to knock on his window before he would even acknowledge my presence. That was the first bad sign.

The second bad sign was that, after loading our bags and taking off, he did not turn on the meter. I leaned across the seat and pointed at the meter. He said, “It’s only three blocks. I’ll take you for free.” Big red flag. But by this time we were halfway to my destination. I just shrugged, “Okay,” I said.

I showed him where to pull in, and he got out to unlock the trunk, but made me lift the heavy bag. Well, it’s free, so I don’t complain. I hand him 300 pesos as a tip. Then it gets weirder.

He tells me I owe him 650 pesos. I remind him that he didn’t turn on the meter, and that he said it was free. He tells me it would be more than 300 pesos to take the bus. I tell him that 300 pesos is more than he would get if it were truly free, and I turn to leave, thinking him an ungrateful person. Millie, not understanding what has just happened, follows me.

As we walk away, and the taxi is waiting at the red light, the taxi driver stands up in the street and starts yelling at us that we are cheapskates, unethical, rude, uneducated, and of course, spoiled foreigners.

Knowing that it was his fault he didn’t turn on the meter when I asked in the first place, and also that he was stuck in traffic and wouldn’t leave his taxi unattended, we just walked away. “Another Chile moment for my blog,” I told Millie.

I hope she didn’t leave Chile with a bad taste in her mouth. It would be great to have her back again sometime.

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Meat is meat, right?

Meat is meat, right? In Chile we get our meat at the supermarket, just like you do in the States. But what you get here varies between slightly different and WAY different than what you buy there.

Let’s take chicken for example. You can buy boxed containers of boneless skinless chicken breast just like you get in the States…or you can buy chicken feet. Yeah, the yellow knobby feet of a chicken. You didn’t even know they were classified as a meat, did you? Well, if you can’t afford to actually put chicken in your chicken soup, you can at least boil some feet in the water and make yourself think it tastes like chicken. And you can buy a package of these feet in the supermarket, right next to the livers and gizzards and other assorted chicken pieces.

And there’s the beef. Except this poor beef got butchered according to a completely different map than ours does in the States. I want sirloin or brisket or even rump roast. I find pieces of beef that I can’t identify their previous location on the animal. I guess someone in the States decided how to cut up beef there, and someone else decided how to cut it here. I still haven’t figured out which piece will turn out like I want it to.

At least there’s always ground beef. I mean hamburger meat is the same everywhere, right? Wrong! Here if you want ground beef, you have to choose between 4% fat and 10% fat. Why so little? No, they don’t put their cows on a fat-reduction diet. They grind up steaks! At one supermarket we used to go to, they didn’t even have ground beef in the case. You just had to ask, and they would freshly grind your steaks into hamburger meat. Why not just eat steak?, I ask!

I can also buy fish, with or without their heads. And lots of other seafood things that I might mistake for cacti if they weren’t in the ice with the other seafood. Something they call a loco looks pretty scary to me. How would you begin to cook or eat something so spiny and prickly? Good thing Mark doesn’t like seafood except for fish. I don’t have to figure that part out much!

My favorite meat that I buy here that I haven’t seen before in the States is a turkey breast that comes in a oven-ready tub. All I have to do is take off the outer wrapping, dump in my seasonings (ask me for that recipe sometime!), and cover it with foil. It takes an hour in the oven, or 20 minutes on the grill, and turkey dinner is ready! Yummy!

Rachel’s favorite part of the meat section is the pork. Not because I ever buy pork, because I don’t. Mostly because it has the silliest looking cuts of meat in the whole store. She especially likes to laugh at the cuts that have a snout in the plastic wrapped foam tray. Now THAT is gross!

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